Saturday, July 24, 2010

How are Things With You, Anyway?

My friend Fi asked me "how are things with you" a couple of days ago.
Fi, whose Indian name is Pollyanna Lay Down Gently, would not accept
a one-word answer, and she's the type of friend who knows when you are
bullshitting her, so I was forced to really think about how things are, and
how I feel about them and how to put it into words.  Which I did:

It is strange not working. I'm in limbo - ready to move but nowhere 
to move to. I have an "exam" for a job in California and I spoke to a 
lady there who said over 200 people are testing for this job. I feel 
like I should wear an old, wrinkled trench coat and carry a rolled up 
newspaper want ads section in one pocket and a paperbag with a 
pint of rye whiskey in the other and walk around dragging my feet in 
black and white on my way to the soup kitchen. In other words, it's
starting to seem like the Depression . . . . . 

 . . . . Life seems strange now.  Not bad, just strange.  Have you ever 
been to the movies in the old days where the movie is on two reels and 
one reel flickers to the end and the low budget theater only has one 
projector so the light come on for just a minute or so while they change 
reels - not enough time to buy popcorn or anything useful. And you sit 
there mentally suspended in the last frame of the movie, waiting, and then 
the beginning of the second tape sputters and starts and the movie continues. 
I feel like I am at that part - the break in reels - and it is taking a really long 
time for the projectionist to get his shit together.

But I'm ok with that. As long as I get to see the end of the movie and it has 
a relatively happy ending.

Image is from a fascinating article
from the Griffiths Cue-Dot Observatory.

1 comment:

jana said...

just found you :) I am kind of overwhelmed with being behind on my internet lovely connections but was so moved by finding your blog girl :)

I totally got a visual of the two reel gig and your writing is rhythmic, enchanting and witty, my friend.

I can imagine that this is a trying transition...limbo can be a trying place....there is a light at the end of the's not a train....maybe it's just so bright because of all of the vivid colors in your rainbow!!

sending hugs and support...if you come to the bay area again, let's connect, if we can :)